Self Criticism: Learning To Love Yourself
Self criticism is useful sometimes. But it depends how you self-critique. Many people are their own worst enemies. They have somehow adopted the destructive belief that holding harsh opinions of themselves will make them stronger and help them in gaining self confidence.
This strategy rarely works. Just as people fail to flourish under a dictatorship, they also fail to flourish under the guidance of a harsh self critic.
Self Criticism: Compassion Is Key
This doesn’t mean self improvement is a waste of time. It’s all about how you go about it. A sense of compassion and self-acceptance is crucial.
Listen to how you talk to yourself. Observe the conversation:
- What are you saying aloud in your mind when you see yourself in the mirror?
- How do you respond when someone pays you a compliment? Do you quickly dismiss it or do you take it as an opportunity to acknowledge how truly wonderful you are?
- How do you approach your areas of potential improvement?
- What about your so-called dark side? How are you about it? Do you acknowledge it or shun it because it’s imperfect?
The people who thrive in this world have learned to accept all sides of themselves. They may see areas for improvement but they never pursue them at the expense of living with peace, contentment and happiness in this moment.
What these people have been able to do, is separate their ego-identity from from their soul-identity. The ego will always be broken, fault-finding, and keen to improve. That’s the nature of the ego. Your soul is perfect right now. It is all-knowing and pure consciousness.
If the process of self improvement will go on forever, then it’s wise to start learning to love yourself now. Gaining self confidence is easy by consciously identifying more often with your soul and turning down the volume of your ego to chatter. Just let it rattle on in the background about all that’s wrong. You don’t need to give it your undivided attention.